Hmmm...

Wait, it’s May!?! Where have I been? For all my lofty aspirations of internet fame and global recognition, I’m not helping my cause with my frequent prolonged absences. Not one bit! Before I make another hollow commitment to continue gracing you, the reader, with my, the writer of all things good, with my virtual presence, I need to backtrack a bit.

I hit a block in my blog a while back when a few things happened at the same time. I will present them to you as they happened without any tomfoolery because I hope to get on to my next hollow commitment in the near future.

First, I wrote a piece about my Grilled Cheese Chase to Perfection calling for an end to this grill-conceived plan with good reason. I just backdated the post here for yesterday, but I mention my now 8-month old kid as a 6-month old. I never posted it because the day that I wrote it the mailman became one of my favorite people.

The mailman, you see, made a speedy delivery of assorted cheeses, a gift from my brother-in-law. It was an awesome gift of fancy Spanish cheeses that I have never even heard of. Thanks, Matt! My grilled cheese desire was rekindled and excitedly flamencoed my way into these new cheeses the following weekend.

I began with the one with the best name, Drunken Goat, and it was fabulous. It has been a while now, but I remember it being both sweet and clean. I know “clean” is a weird way to describe cheese, but I’m not sure if cheese can ever be “refreshing” or “invigorating.” “Refreshing” should be reserved for a grilled cheese sandwich that is dripping with condensation on a warm summer afternoon. Continuing with the lemonade comparison, “invigorating” might be the early morning run to be the first in-line to the grilled cheese stand in a near-by park. I imagine the run home would be something other than invigorating.

The next day, I dove into another of the cheeses, the sharp Garrotxa, and this is where things went all wrong. Here’s a video:

I had all but forgotten about my cheddar-induced sweaty cheek syndrome. I always thought of it more as a party trick that I bragged about in college. I never considered that it could be the sign of something a bit more menacing, but after this video was shot my tongue and throat started feeling funny as well. While it was nothing a few Zyrtec couldn't fix, this event brought memories of scarier incidents and left me wondering if I had eaten a whole bunch of cheese that fateful day in 2008.

My attitude towards the new cheeses waned a bit after that, but I did try them in the coming weeks. The Iberico cheese was my favorite of the bunch. It was pretty good on a grilled cheese sandwich, but was excellent on homemade pizza.

A third, even more, troubling event took place that next week. I’m still having trouble wrapping my head around it, but I hope to explain it in the next day or two… before I make my next hollow commitment to blogging excellence! May your anticipation always grow!

Wait Weight, You’re Gaining On Me & The Ultimate Grilled Cheese

It has been some time since I referenced my New Year’s Resolution directly. My Grilled Cheese Chase to Perfection began as a resolution and has been featured somewhat prominently. The focus on this one item on my list of resolutions, which I trumpeted as being “two typed pages, single-spaced,” has clouded another resolution: to lose weight.

With a top-secret target weight in mind, I set out to lose between ten and fifteen pounds. I have been carrying around these extra ten or fifteen pounds for years now, and it is high-time that I say good-bye. Unfortunately, so far this year, I have gained between ten and fifteen pounds and now look to lose between twenty and twenty-five pounds. It seemed much less daunting before.

I have taken a hard look at different parts of my life, deciding where to place blame. Could Red Box be the culprit? Perhaps my sweet tooth is finally catching up with me. My office life behind a spreadsheet could be the problem. Maybe I should replace my Grilled Cheeses with carrot sticks.

I’m still unsure how best to tackle this issue, but I feel I should begin by not glorifying grilled cheese sandwiches, so it is with some sadness that I post my last Perfect Grilled Cheese attempt.

It features delicious Oatnut bread with a combination of Havarti, Mozzarella, and a touch of good ol’ American Cheese. What makes this sandwich unique however is the outside. Instead of using butter to grill up the bread, I coated the slices with mayonnaise. The result is excellent. It not only adds a different taste, it looks wonderful as it toasts the bread very nicely.

I got the idea from a recent list of the Top Ten Grilled Cheese Sandwiches in America published in Food & Wine magazine. Roxey’s in Boston is famous for their use of mayonnaise, so I cannot take credit for it. The list is another reason I’ve grown weary of the project. Like the name of my 6-month old, it suddenly seems trendy.