The Wii

This past month has been a big one. Between the Christmas and the New Years and the Martin Luther King Day and the snow days, it is almost easy to overlook my wife’s birthday. It would never be okay to overlook her birthday, but I do see that it is easy for it to get lost in the shuffle. I’m just saying that after a big Christmas of giving and receiving, it is easy to fall into a bit of gift fatigue for the few weeks afterwards.

This gift fatigue is something that true gift-givers can spot early on and prepare for. I, admittedly, may have a lot to learn on this subject, but my in-laws, however, mastered this obstacle this year with the gift of …. A Wii.

Tiff and I went to their place for a birthday celebration where it was revealed soon after we arrived. Then I had roast beef. Tiff had none. And then we talked about Wiiiiiiiii!!, all the way home. (rimshot)

Perhaps I’m about three years too late to write any relevant review, but as far as video game consoles go, the wii is something else. After years of playing video games, I have attained a certain amount of hand-eye coordination. Conversely, I have not developed much, for lack of a better term, other coordination. Call it “body motion fluidity” or “limb placement awareness” or “corpus controllus” or simply “grace;” whatever it is, I don’t have it.

To illustrate: the wii comes with a game where you can play tennis, box, bowl, golf, and even play baseball! I opened it up, pushed in the disc and played up a storm. Then, after I had sufficiently mastered each event, I took on the test your age challenge. I returned serves and hit homeruns and even picked up a couple spares like an old pro. Convinced the wii would indicate that I was the perfect specimen of health, I eagerly pressed ahead to find out my results, which tell you the age your body is performing at… I believe 20 is the best.

I’m 47.

There’s nothing wrong with being 47, except when you are thirty. That’s okay though, I’ll just keep working at it. Maybe my wife can get me something to help me out with my wii age for my birthday.