Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Giving Thanks to... The Prince William County Parks Authority

It came out of nowhere. Big and hairy and carrying a stench so vile that few people live to tell about it.

Let me back up… Everything changes with the seasons, most notably the lake where I eat lunch often. The leaves turn into a vivid array of splendid colors that makes one think, “now, THIS is why man invented the color TV!” Then the leaves quickly fall to the ground, revealing a depressing world of suburban townhomes just beyond the curtain of trees and forces one to think, “now, this is why man invented the TV.”

The falling temperatures and rising winds have forced me to move from the shade by the lake to a sunny picnic table near the lake. Today was a bit warmer, I was enjoying another delectable Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich and some dry cereal – it’s almost Thanksgiving and I haven’t gone to the store – thinking about the wonders of my thoughts when I turn to face a giant beast! It had a stick in its mouth and a wag in its tail.

It was a giant dog the size of a school bus and appeared to have recently plunged into the lake where I eat lunch often and now wanted to play. Wrapped up by its enthusiasm, I put out my hand to pet the big wet dog, and it, in turn, jumped in my lap. This is not what I wanted to happen, and as I let out a moan, the wild creature raced off back towards the lake.

As I stood there shaking my internal fist, I could feel the infection of wet dog smell sweep over me, emanating from my wet pants. It was then that I decided it was time to give thanks.

Dear Prince William County Parks Authority,

I just wanted to say thank you for all your excellent work with the parks in the county. I regularly visit the Lakeridge Marina and always appreciate the peace and quiet that it affords.  The park is always clean and well-maintained making it a delight each and every time I go.

I also really like the new park near Haymarket; I believe it is called Silver Lake.  I've only been a handful of times, but have enjoyed it every time.  At first I was disappointed to learn that a middle school was being built so close to the lake, but when it is done it will be wonderful for both the students and the community alike.

Thanks again and happy holidays,
John Duffy

Monday, November 22, 2010

Thanks for Nothing

Thanks for nothing Muted Guerrilla.

I truly am thankful for so much each and everyday. But in an effort to maintain my rugged masculinity, I have faltered in my attempt to thank someone every single day. As I’ve alluded to before, it just doesn’t feel right to go around giving thanks all the time. Plus, if you deserve a thank you, you know what it is you did, and a simple, heart-felt, “Thanks” should sum it up.

That being said, I started this nonsense, so I’ll see it through, however sporadic it happens to be, till the end of the month. I had to back-date a number of posts, but don’t miss my thanks to an artist, a radio station, a website, a restaurant, and a superstar.

Giving Thanks to... John Sovjani

Dear John Sovjani,

I just wanted to say that it was a pleasure to speak with you this past Saturday at the art show in Gaithersburg , MD. My wife and I bought several of your prints and we love them all. They really help make our new(ish) home feel like ours.

We had bought a few small prints five or six years ago when we were just dating and we have always said how much we would love to decorate our walls with your artwork. Now that we have started this, I cannot tell you how pleased we both are with it.

Thank you so much, happy holidays,
John and Tiffany Duffy
They really are awesome. We went to the artshow mainly to see him, and he was one of the last booths we walked past. His booth is set up so that he has originals on one side and prints on the other.

After we decided on which ones we wanted,
we were waiting in line to purchase them – he was doing some serious business, and chatting up a storm with each and every one, which I think is part of the appeal – I struck up a conversation with an older couple… or well, they started talking to me. I had heard the man talking earlier about the pieces that he has in his attic that he doesn’t have room for. The first thing he said to me was along the lines of “that print there… I own the original. It looks amazing in the spare bedroom of my house in Delaware.” They bought three originals from him. Maybe one day that will be me, but if I had to guess… my second home will not be in Delaware.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Giving Thanks to... Christmas Radio

Dear 97.1 WASH-FM,

More than any other one thing, I know the holiday season is here when you switch your broadcast to the 24 hour Christmas playlist. Thank you for adding to this wonderful time of year. Music is so powerful in that it can invoke memories, relieve stress, set the mood, and bring joy and happiness to all. This is especially true around the holidays with Christmas music.

Happy Holidays!
John Duffy
So… truthfully? The local radio station switched over to all Christmas joy on Friday. I love me some holiday music, hence the thank you, but all Christmas, all the time is a bit much. It may be the happ-happiest season of all but there’s a fine line between parties for hosting and marshmallows for roasting, and there’s an epoch gulf between scary ghost stories and tales of the glories of Christmases long, long agoooo.

Plus, there are only so many Christmas songs. Just because Bing Crosby sings it one hour and Clay Aiken sings it the next, does not hide the fact that they are the same song being played within 60 minutes of each other. And… there’s a reason why some songs don’t have any covers. If I have to hear George Michaels singing “Last Christmas, you gave me your heart,” one more time, I might be sick. And don’t even get me started on the one that truly is just terrible, “It’s Christmas Eve in Washington .” Who thinks that’s a good song? It’s terrible!

There are some great Christmas songs though and I do like having the option to listen to Christmas music on the radio. My favorite Christmas songs though, I think are the two Christmas CD’s we listen to, Ray Charles Christmas and some jazz trio’s Jazzy Christmas.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Giving Thanks to... Groupon

Dear Groupon,

Like jell-o and the stock market, I have no idea how you work but I like you very much. Today, I was able to attend two great events that I would not have attended had it not been for the amazing deals I found on your website.

We had wanted to attend the Sugarloaf Crafts Festival, but I believe your deal made it happen, as it was a bit of a drive for us. We ended up finding quite a bit of stuff that we plan to hang on the walls of our new home.

And then, we got to see the Fairfax Symphony Orchestra for $20 off a ticket! It was a lot of fun, with the first and last songs being wonderful, and the song in the middle being so God-awful that I will remember it as long as I live. Your impact was evident at the symphony, as there was a line of folks with their printed receipts waiting to collect their tickets.

All in all good job, and I look forward to finding more great opportunities.

Thanks again and Happy Thanksgiving,
John Duffy

Friday, November 19, 2010

Giving Thanks to... Glory Days Grill

Dear Glory Days Grill,

Just wanted to say thank you for your excellent promotion that you are running with the Washington Capitals. I’m not a big hockey fan, but I got to go to a game recently for the first time and had an amazing time. The Caps won the game 6-4.

With the game tied 4-4, the arena erupted when John Erskine powered a shot in from the blue line to give the Caps the lead. Everyone went crazy. It was awesome. What made it even better, with this fifth goal, was the message of FREE WINGS that flashed on the scoreboards. FREE WINGS! FREE WINGS!

Well, tonight, my wife and I went to your restaurant in Gainesville , VA to redeem our free wings, and they were delicious. We both chose your signature sauce, and we both loved them. We will definitely be headed your way next time we get a hankering for some chicken wings.

Our waitress, whose name I don’t remember, was awesome, by the way. She advised me not to try a hoppsier beer, because it’s too hoppsy, which I appreciate. Oh, and my meal was excellent too, but after the free wings, a Mac’N’Cheese Burger is a lot of burger.

Happy Thanksgiving!
John Duffy
And thanks again goes to Merrifield Garden Center … it’s the gift that keeps on giving!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Giving Thanks to... Gwyneth Paltrow

Dear Gwyneth Paltrow,

I never knew my wife was such a fan of yours until recently. With my wife’s insistence, I found myself watching all of the Country Music Awards last week and an episode of Glee, due to your appearance on both shows. I thought both were surprisingly fun to watch. I wanted to thank you for re-introducing me to country and for introducing me to that Cee-Lo Green song, which cracks me up.

I’m not much of a country fan, but your performance on the CMA’s was excellent, and I look forward to your upcoming movie. I actually liked a lot of the music that night, and programmed one of the buttons on my car radio to a country station. Country music can be a lot of fun, and when you haven’t heard any in a long time, it’s even better.

I’ve never watched a full episode of Glee. I kind of like the song and dance but the rest of the show is a little too much. The show did make me laugh, especially the line “You smell homeless.” I really liked the first song you sang though, and a good song can’t be beat. I looked it up and I love it.
Thanks for everything and keep on surprising me,
John Duffy
As for Cee-Lo's video... prepared to be blown away... for those who care, I went with the radio edit version, just because. The name of the song is not actually "Forget You."

Monday, November 15, 2010

Giving Thanks to... Merrifield Garden Center

Last night I got to go to a Capitals hockey game, so my thank you is warranted and therefore pretty easy. We even made a video saying thanks:

Dear Merrifield Garden Center,

My wife and I were lucky enough to have our names pulled from a drawing of yours where we won tickets to a Capitals game. We went last night to watch them beat the Atlanta Thrashers, 6-4. It was awesome.

For both of us, it was our first hockey game, and it made a fan out of both of us. We spent awhile trying to figure out all the rules, which I’m not sure we ever did, but it was easy enough to know when to cheer, which we were lucky enough to do throughout the game.

All-in-all, we had an amazing time and just wanted to say thank you for giving us the opportunity. We discovered your store (in Gainesville ) only recently and have become fans of you as well. We got three mums from you guys that are making the two we got at Lowe’s look bad… we’ve moved them behind yours.

Can’t thank you enough,
John Duffy
Here’s another video.  This one's of the second goal, which Tiff was able to catch on video… she doesn’t video throughout these events, but after a DC United goal and Redskins touchdown and having the camera ready for this, it’s clear that she has a talent for it.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Giving Thanks to... Josh

I haven’t quite established the rules for this month of thanks giving, so I’m a little unsure who to thank. I’m hoping that once the “who” is identified the question of “how” will work itself out, because so far, it all feels a little awkward. My one rule of thanking someone every day hasn’t exactly been followed, which oddly makes it even harder to write a thank you.

Part of the problem is that I don’t want to get too personal. A lot of days the people who I have the most reason to thank are friends or coworkers who I don’t feel comfortable writing about on the internet. Plus, “Hey thanks for helping me out back there; I really owe you one” isn’t always thank-you-note worthy and would just create an odd working relationship. I would become the weird guy who writes thank you notes, which is fine among family and friends, but colleagues is a different story.

I had visions of writing thank yous to famous people, but at what point does a thank you just become basic fan mail, and I feel like I’m too old for fan mail. “Hey thanks for making that really cool movie.” It would be neat to collect folks autographs though. Somebody in my family tree did that several generations back and amassed the signatures of lots of people who I mostly don’t know but included Sam Houston and President Zachary Taylor. I think it was Taylor . Anyways, that’s a different task all together though, and didn’t require any thanks.

I had a friend growing up who became an eagle scout and he invited all these famous people to his eagle scout ceremony. I remember him getting an autographed picture from Charlton Heston and thinking “Hey, it’s Ben Hur!”

Maybe I should be thanking people like my old friends who I’ve lost touch with over the years and just say, “It sucks we’ve grown apart. Thanks for all the great memories.” Sure it would sound a bit like a yearbook entry, but this time I’d mean it.

All that being said, I may have to search for an address on this one, but:
Dear Josh,

Hey man, it’s John Duffy! I got to thinking about you today and felt compelled to write to see how you are doing. I don’t think we’ve seen each other for some ten or so years, pretty crazy eh? It sucks that we grew apart. I know we had some great laughs back in the day and, in the spirit of Thanksgiving, I just wanted to say thanks for all the good times growing up.

...
Anyways, I hope you and your family are doing well,
John Duffy
The actual letter included more, but you get the basic idea.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Giving Thanks to... Timothy

Is it too early to thank my own stupidity?  Here is a picture of my finger:
That white stuff is a hunk of skin.
This morning I woke up and thought an apple would be the perfect start to my day.  It was not, as it turns out.  The carnage that followed was of my own stupidity, although a deceivingly sharp apple slicer (corer?) played a part in it.  I'm counting on Neosporin working as advertised.  As far as thanking folks, there are lots of people to thank on this Veteran's Day, but I'm going to have to write my thank you to Timothy.

This being a holiday for me but not for my wife, I had grand visions of a three course meal with a tablecloth and the whole works.  My plans changed a bit after slicing my finger open and I ended up dilly-dallying the whole day away.  When Tiffany got home there was nothing on the stove and no candle-lit dinner.  So, thirty minutes later, Timothy appeared on my doorstep with Domino's.

Dear Domino's Timothy,

Thank you for your prompt delivery.  I had just asked my wife how long did the internet say it would be when the doorbell rang.  It was perfect timing!  The Domino's on-line ordering is great by the way.  I love the new sound effects.  That rocker can really wail!  They gave my wife and I a good laugh. 

Keep up the good work!

Rock on!
John Duffy
"Your pizza is in the oveeeeeen, and is getting hot, HOT, HOT!!"

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Giving Thanks to... Hilton Hotels

I don’t want to dwell on my rather uneventful stay at the Hilton Hotel in Virginia Beach , but today, they sent me an email thanking me for my stay. This email had all the warmth and sincerity of any automated message, but I figure it is kind of them, even if it’s just an attempt to win my business in the future.

I really didn’t do much to be thanked. My last few posts have not been anything to thank me over. In fact, if anything, I feel a bit bad for criticizing, however little that was criticizing.  Plus,  I was their guest; I should be thanking them!! So here’s a little note I wrote, doing just that:
Dear Hilton Virginia Beach Oceanfront,

Last week I had the good fortune to stay at your hotel for three nights. I had a wonderful experience. Everyone I spoke to was incredibly kind and more than helpful, answering any question that I had.

My stay was the result of a conference that was being held at your hotel. It wasn’t the most exciting conference, but the accommodations were wonderful… and the chocolate chip cookies were delicious!

All-in-all, I just wanted to say thanks for a job well done!

Sincerely and Happy Thanksgiving!
John Duffy
I’m not sure how I feel about sending this out. It seems unnecessary to say the least, but I’m sealing it up, and dropping it in the mailbox. It’s time I start appreciating things a bit and what better time to say thanks than with Thanksgiving right around the corner.

That’s why, after some deliberation, I’m going to make a go of giving thanks, lots of thanks. So, with the ulterior motive of drawing millions of people to my blog, I plan on giving thanks to someone… anyone, everyday at least till the end of the month. I’m getting a late start, so I feel like I should go longer, but I’m not committing myself to that.  I kind of feel like I might be biting off more than I can chew as it is, but we'll see!  So, be sure to tune in tomorrow, who knows who I'll be thanking... I certainly don't.

In other news, I wore a tie to work on Monday. Nobody batted an eye.

Sunday, November 07, 2010

Hotelevision

Growing up, I didn't get to stay in a hotel very often.  When I did, it was usually just a sleepover stay on a long car ride, but even still, it was always a bit exciting.  In my head, one of the more exciting things about it was always the television - albeit perhaps that is just because it fits with this post.

At home as a kid, we had four or five channels that came in pretty well and then another two or three that were fuzzy or came in sometimes. Judging by the amount of TV that I watched, it was all I needed and more.  In elementary school, for example, I could recite, word for word, entire Looney Tunes cartoons.  I remember performing Muscle Tussle as part of a class assignment.  This wouldn't be nearly as impressive today, given the internet.

Hotels though offered something truly spectacular for television-loving kids like me, cable television.  Truthfully, I only remember the USA network and TNT, both of which played different cartoons than those that I was used to.  But I am sure that it offered the regular slew of channels that were around back then: CNN, the Weather Channel, ESPN, MTV, and... we're there others?  WGN, Chicago's "Superstation".

I keep getting off topic, but growing up in Atlanta, TBS, Atlanta's "Superstation" was broadcast for free, so I didn't think it was anything special until much later in life.

Then as I grew older, a good hotel separated itself among the pack by having HBO!  This was something beyond spectacular.  People swore on HBO!  There was a chance that you could catch a brief glimpse of nudity!  Talk about great!

The point is, though, hotels once used television as an amenity meant to put it ahead of the competition.  As a result, hotels far outshone the home entertainment of what I was used to.  Staying at a nice hotel this past week, I learned that this is no longer the case. 

HD has become the standard in television, and it seems like it's been around for a long, long time.  Long enough for a hotel as well-respected as Hilton to jump on the bandwagon.  I actually just made the switch myself a few months ago.  I didn't realize how much of a difference it would make, particularly with sports.  I generally don't think of myself as a snob, particularly when it comes to technology, but this lack of HD annoyed me a surprising amount.

I grew to accept the standard definition-ness world being broadcast to me pretty quickly though, but one thing I never grew accustomed to was a little television innovation known as the guide.  You can scroll through to see what's on now or anytime in the next week.  I love it and use it like I love it, and not having it this past week was just plain annoying.  It's five minutes to the hour, what can I watch next? I don't know... and by the time the next round of shows start it takes five minutes going through all the channels to see what's on, by which point you've lost the beginning of any show you decide on.  Frustrating.

I suppose television innovation has become not only a rapidly transforming thing, but also one that people tend to apply to their homes so it loses its allure a bit in hotels.  Hotels, as a result, have turned to other upgrades and features to draw in their clientele, like Murphy beds and double-headed showers.

Or perhaps, the hotel is just trying to subtly suggest, "Hey, get out of the hotel room for a while."

Friday, November 05, 2010

The Shower Head

I was lucky enough to spend a couple of days at a Hilton oceanside hotel. I felt very high class. There are a couple of strange things about the place though, not least among them was that my bed was a Murphy bed.  It was downthe whole time, and now I'm regretting not having put it away just to see what it's like.

All the comfort of an upscale futon!
This picture is actually from Wikipedia.  I didn't see any instructions on the actual bed, but even if I had, I couldn't have taken a picture myself as I haven't entered the BlogCamEra, just yet.  Maybe a newer phone with a camera in it would be nice.

There was one thing that I thought was so odd that, without camera, I had to draw a picture of it to help explain it.  Here's a drawing of the hotel shower.
La-la-laaa!
Do you see anything strange about this picture?  Why yes, my bellybutton is lower - but that's not what I'm talking about.  My hotel room shower had a double shower head.  I'm not sure what for.  My guess is to get extra clean.

Actually, here is my guess as to how it came to be.  The scene is a skinny-tied hotelier and a wide-tied builder:
Hotelier (dreaming of a two-person shower, with a shower head on either side): I just heard of the next big thing.  Picture this: TWO shower heads in every shower... in every room... in every one of our hotels!

Builder: I don't know, boss, that just seems strange.  Seems to me that showers are just fine with just the one shower head.

H: No, this... this is going to be huge!  I'm telling you, people love their upgrades.  Someday, every house in America will have two shower heads.  It's going to be great!

B:  If you say so, boss.

H: You didn't believe me when I said the Murphy bed is back and now look at it.  People have all that extra hotel room space with just a little lift of their bed!

B:  A truer statement has never been said, boss.

H: How much extra are we talking about here to install a second shower head?

B: I don't know, $50 extra bucks or so.

H: You can do it for that cheap! Let's do this!  We'll be world-renowned for our showers with TWO shower heads!  I can see it now!  The waiting list for one of our rooms will be months. 

B: You're the boss, boss. Two-headed showers, coming up.
In my head that was two lines of dialogue.  I kind of get carried away.

Wednesday, November 03, 2010

Making Money

That last post reminds me, I finally got ads up on my YouTube videos! The delay was the result of user error… I’m going to blame my intern Jeff. It started counting last Thursday and I’ve already made over a dollar!

That being said, here they are… please study them closely, over and over, as many times as you need to:


Tuesday, November 02, 2010

On to November

October was a lot of fun. I posted more last month than ever, which is something I’m oddly proud of. Granted, not too many of the posts were earth-shatteringly brilliant, but aside from wearing a tie everyday, I posted everyday, which is an accomplishment in and of itself.

I believe my wife came to resent the challenge a bit. Lost was the line “hey, Honey! I’m home!” replaced by the ever-so cordial, “hey, do you have the camera? Let’s take the picture so I can take this thing off.” I think that any future tie-wearing days will include a loosened-tie commute home.

Unfortunately, it’s now back to regular blogging. As the campaign signs along my tie-wearing commute have reminded me, with a sense of unintended doom, “November is coming.” I’ve spent a lot of the past month fearing the impending November, as I felt I needed another challenge, or gimmick, to carry me through the next month. I’ve had several ideas of what could be done, from eating oatmeal for breakfast each day to 5-minute showers to wearing a hat, but none of them really excite me. The tie-wearing campaign allowed for easy posts and public displays of commitment, which it seems, should be a stipulation for such challenges.

The daily post is something to strive for though. I don’t it will continue for long – in fact, I’ll be out of town the rest of the week – but it does give me something to shoot for.

I mean dang, not only was last month my active month posting, I also earned more money last month through Google AdSense than ever before. In fact, last month I doubled my revenue… to $18! A few more bucks and I’ll earn enough for a sale-priced new tie!

Monday, November 01, 2010

Not Wearing Ties

After wearing a tie everyday for a month, today I returned to work a bit more casual.
My neck is cold.

Yes, Tietober is over but the memories will last a lifetime. At times, I hated having to put a tie on or having something tight around my neck, but more often than not, I liked looking spiffy.

I don’t think people treated me any different, except maybe some of the older ladies who I think just thought I looked cute… which I did, as always. I’m not sure if I learned anything or came to any realization, perhaps because I wasn’t looking for anything like that. As I said though, I did come to enjoy wearing ties and will likely choose to wear a tie to work in the future.

In fact, this past Friday, I ran into something of a dilemma. Kohl’s was having a big sale, so the wife and I went to check out the deals. As I was walking through the men’s clothes, I realized that I wasn’t sure what my style of clothes was. I had worn ties so long that I was leaning toward the nicer looking shirts and even spent some time looking at the ties – all of which looked much more impressive than any that I own; I don’t think I wore a true Power Tie once!

After deciding to pass on everything as a result of this dilemma, the wife encouraged me to get something, so I ended up with a dressy shirt ready to button at the neck. I spent a month wearing ties just for something to do. Now that the month’s up, I’m planning my wardrobe around the knotted accessories.